You are not to blame

If you

have been the victim

of sexual assault or harassment, know that

  • What happened to you was not your fault

  • Whether or not you said "no" or tried to fight, it was still not your fault

  • You are not alone: 1 in 6 women and 1 in 33 men have experienced an attempted or completed rape.

  • You are not damaged, worthless, or to blame

  • You are strong, important, and deserve happiness

Feel Strong Sexually

You do not owe anyone (even a spouse) sex

You can change your mind at any point during sex

  • Agreeing to one sexual act is not agreeing to all

  • Participating in a sexual act at one time does not obligate you to do it again

You have a right to use protection

  • Don't rely on your partner, take responsibility for yourself

    • Use your preferred method of birth control and protection against STI's

  • Be aware that anyone can use reproductive coercion: getting pregnant or sabotaging birth control in order to gain commitment from the other partner

  • Use protection until you are both sure you are exclusive and you have both shared your STI panel results with each other

  • Having this kind of conversation is neither pleasant nor easy. Practice what you will say with a friend or in the mirror until you feel more comfortable. But like the Nike commercial, "Just do it"!

You have a right to know if your partner has an STI

  • While it may be awkward at first, knowing about your partner's sexual health could save your life

  • Discuss STI's before the clothes come off

  • Ask for a STI panel to be run at every annual checkup, even in a comitted relationship

You can say "No"

  • No means no

  • No doesn't mean:

    • Maybe

    • Yes

    • Convince me

  • If you froze because you were scared and couldn't say no, were incapacitated and couldn't say no, or were coerced into saying yes, it's still not your fault


Victims of sexual assault are:

3 times more likely to suffer from depression.

6 times more likely to suffer from post-traumatic stress disorder.

13 times more likely to abuse alcohol.

26 times more likely to abuse drugs.

4 times more likely to contemplate suicide.

If you or a loved one has experienced sexual assault, let us help with our

resources page 

which has an extensive list of supportive phone numbers, organizations, and reading material